At what age did life start moving at warp speed for you?
Mine hit around 35. One year it was just faster, and it has not slowed down since.
The years I can replay are the ones with a first in them. The years that blur are the ones I ran on autopilot.
So the obvious move is to go collect more firsts. Take the trip. Learn the thing.
I do not think that is quite right.
Chapter one of the book I am writing is called Firsts. Not just the good ones. The other kind too. The ones I never put on a list.
Every door I walked through that I could not walk back out of.
Those I can still replay minute by minute. Not because they were wonderful. Because they cost something, and what costs something gets remembered.
The good firsts do the same work. First love. First sober morning. First honest conversation with someone I had been managing instead of truly knowing.
But firsts run out. You get a finite number.
Here is what I did not expect: Most of what I can still replay is not a first at all.
Sunday dinners at my parents. Holidays and quarterly birthdays with the whole extended family. Standing lunches or happy hours with friends and colleagues (those look different for me now).
Nothing on that list is remarkable. The ones I can replay are the ones I was present for. Not half listening. Not running the next meeting in my head.
There are fifty-two Sundays in a year and we do not make all of them. Nobody says out loud how many are left with the same people around the same table.
Firsts announce themselves.
Moments do not. That is the only real difference, and it is why they are the ones I keep missing.
A first forces me to pay attention. A moment only slows down if I decide to.
So the question is not how do I get more time.
It is where am I willing to actually be.
What age did it hit you, and what slowed it down?